Struggling to Find the Motivation to Blog

I am sitting here struggling with what I should write about. It has been so long since the last time that I wrote anything for this blog. So often I have wanted to write something, but for one reason or another, I failed to do so.  I think part of the reason for not writing has to do with not attending church in the last few months. I seem to write more when I have that feeling of being closer to God, which lately I haven’t felt. Lately though, I do feel God calling me back to church, which I still haven’t done. I am planning on attending this Saturday though.

Seeing it has been several months since I last posted anything here, you may wonder what I have been up too. Well, I have been busy with my 3 jobs, working on my house, and trying to be more social then I had been in the past. Trying to balance these things can be a bit of a struggle some weeks.  Actually, it has been most weeks. I have had clients for my web design business get upset with me due to my lack of time to do something they think is needed right now. I have had that I meet recently get upset that I didn’t have as much time to spend with them as they felt I should. There are also a lot of things around my house that I haven’t gotten around to that I believe needs to be completed by the end of fall. We will see if I can get all of it done or not.

Besides that, there isn’t much else going on in my life.  I may be getting a cat soon from a friend. I’m not really a cat person, I would prefer to have a dog, but a dog would need more attention than I could provide at the moment.  So I am thinking a cat may be nice around my house. A cat doesn’t need as much attention as a dog would. I also wonder if having a cat will help me to express some emotions better. For some reason, it seems that if I go to a house where there is a cat, the cat sits on my lap or continually visits me. I have heard somewhere that cat is more sensitive to emotions. My grandma’s cat would always sit on my lap, which she would did for my uncle and I.  Her cat hasn’t the nicest cat (My guess the cat was had issues from when she was younger and my cousin’s daughter tried to flush her down the toilet) and would also tried to claw me when I wanted to get up. My grandma would have to get her cat off my lap so I was able to leave without it digging its claws into me.

A few years ago, a friend of mine had a crazy cat. This cat was mean, but for some reason it would come sit on my lap as well. When I wanted to leave, my friend would have to throw her cat off me (This cat was truly crazy and would claw anyone that got near it).

Just if you are wondering, my friend ensured me the cat he is willing to give me is not crazy. He is littered trained and does not scratch furniture, which to me are all good things.  It is a male cat who is about 6 months old, but doesn’t have a name yet. If you have any good suggestions for an all black cat, please let me know in a comment below.

Well, I don’t really know what else to write about. I would like to thank all those that have taken the time to read any blog postings on this site as well as those that have contacted me. Sorry I take such a long time to respond to messages from this website.

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7 Responses to Struggling to Find the Motivation to Blog

  1. siberia says:

    Hey Joe,

    Just stumbled across your blog. I am a parish secretary and I have a son who is gay. Just wanted to say, keep on blogging! I thank God every day that I can make connections through the internet with other gay Catholics, their family and friends so that we can reach out in support ad love. God bless you.

    So – you are a Captain America fan. I saw the movie recently. Have you? What didi you think?

  2. Raul Miguel says:

    A suggestion to name a black cat? I’d imagine that as you get to know the pet better, a nickname will come up naturally among the verbal endearments lavished upon him, and that could end up being the name. I once had a female cat originally named Gorgeous, yet you might be surprised how many nicknames came out of my mouth toward her — Gogas, Gwagga, Gorgosaurus, Velociraptor, Notoungulate (lol, some of these show my affinity toward prehistoric life).

    I suppose I’m not as much a cat magnet as you seem to be, but it turns out I’ve long preferred cats to dogs as pets. Someone among my family is taking care of a rottweiler that I used to be scared of, until I saw for myself just how surprisingly tame that dog is, considering its breed. Now I’m sure that, when that dog passes on, I’ll take it hard. In any case, my landlord won’t allow pets at all, which may be just as well, since my daily life leaves little room for taking care of one.

    Just curious to know if you were able to return to Mass after all. No judgmentalism meant in that query at all. I feel need to emphasize that, since (and I speak only for myself) I’ve made it a point to attend Mass every weekend and day of obligation, sometimes even on weekdays. But that’s mainly because I’m a believer in the 77 graces and fruits made available to me at every Mass I attend. (The book “The Incredible Catholic Mass” by Fr. Martin Von Cochem enlightened me many years ago about this.) At times, I’ll even tolerate boring homilies and ridiculous behavior among parishioners, all for the sake of obtaining those free yet abundant graces and fruits.

    I have one sister who takes it hard whenever she and her husband miss out on Mass, but in her case it’s understandable, since I’ve seen for myself how much of their time is demanded, and their energy drained, by their little boys. Don’t get me wrong, my sister loves her sons, and I’m personally fond of those nephews of mine. But if those boys can wipe ME out, now I can understand how much harder it is to regularly attend Mass while being a parent. Me being a single gay man, the burden’s not that great.

    This past Sunday, I managed in the same morning to go to Mass and find the motivation to attend worship at an Episcopal church afterward. This was the third time this year that I visited that particular Episcopal Church — the second time was due to my being inspired after reading Fr. Alberto Cutie’s book “Dilemma: A Priest’s Struggle with Faith and Love.” You may get the impression I’m an avid reader — I’m not really, but I try every so often. The latter book was very unsettling, yet also difficult to “put down,” as the phrase goes toward the type of books we’ve had all this time. Actually, “Dilemma” is the first book I read entirely on a Nook that I’d bought earlier in the year.

    Anyway, I’m hardly a blogger on my part, yet I felt like simply sharing my ramblings, now that I woke up early on this Saturday morning. I’d noticed your blog just over a month ago, Joe (I hope I got your name correct, guy). Yet I never got around to responding until now. I guess, like you, I’ve been overwhelmed with other things occupying my time. But if it’s any encouragement to you at all, know that you’ve been on my mind. And undoubtedly you’ll be included in my private Mass intentions this weekend. :-)

    P.S. I hope my reply doesn’t go through twice — had an online connection problem when I tried sending it a moment ago, lol.

  3. kenneth farias says:

    well iam a gay catholic myself but iam older and wiser i dont listen to people who want to degrade me for who iam iam a good person always willing to help other people in need when i was 18 i was called to the priesthood but at 18 my hormones were raging and i knew i could go without human contact people have told me that i would have made a good priest,i think so to anyhow my life went to another direction the nursing field i love it beause i could do what i do best taking care of people i stopped working about 8 years ago because i had a nervous and mental breakdown but iam back now and i want t lve my life helping oter people if i can and to grown old with the love of god surrounding me thats it thanks ken farias

  4. Anonymous says:

    If you’re feeling down, I recommend watching My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. It’s something akin to an anti-depressant, only without the possibility of withdrawal or dependency issues.

  5. Nick says:

    Hey Joe!

    Keep the blog going! This is a topic many people are struggling with, especially since both pride parades and the Catholic Church seem to be often in the public eye these days, however absolutely no one is free from sin and, straight, gay, or somewhere in between, everyone has a cross to bear. May I suggest the Courage Catholic Apostolate for you to look in to? Here’s the website:
    http://couragerc.net/

  6. Mike M says:

    Hey Joe,
    be assured of my prayers friend! and know that what your going through is completely normal in the spiritual life, “The dark night of the soul” as Saint John of the Cross calls it. when we don’t feel Gods presence is probably when we are the closest to him. many saints have experienced it (Mother Theresa speaks intensely about how for many years she went without feeling God) But in the end the dry period is meant to bring us closer to him! Hold On Brother!!! Know that I’m praying for you! Know that Our Blessed Mother, Your Guardian angel and the saints in Heaven are praying for you! and that Jesus loves you!!
    In the Love of Christ,
    Mike
    +JMJ+

  7. Allyssa says:

    Hello,
    My name is Allyssa. I am straight, but I was introduced to your blog by my cousin. I have family members, friends, and role models that are gay. I am a HUGE supporter of equal rights and I’m so thankful that my cousin showed me this. I think that it’s hard being Catholic and supporting gay equality regardless if a person is straight or gay. I feel like everyone is giving up on their faith because of how hateful some people can be. I pray that you find strength in your faith and that one day people will respect your religion and your love life. I was made fun of a lot as a kid, I was awkward and skinny and until I reached my eight grade year, I hardly had any friends. I think I support gay equality so much because like my awkwardness, and like Christ, the Gay community is chastised for being different. I know that only God can be our judge and I know that he made all of us a certain way for a reason.
    I wish you the best.

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