Lately I have just been feeling lost, unsure of the direction I need to take in my life. At least that is the way it feels. Reality is I know what changes I need to make. I know that the path I am on isn’t the right one. I know as DMX in a song, “All I need to do is call Your name, Father”. But it always seems the path we should be on is the more difficult path. The wrong path appears to be more fun, less stressful, easier to manage. I do know these are all tricks to pull our eyes away from the real prize, the true being that we should be walking a path towards.
One area that I have really been struggle in is manage the amount of work I do in a week. Lately it seems that I have been working anywhere from 60 to 80 hours per week. Plus I have been working on getting my house ready for winter, getting the yard raked up, and little things around the house to keep it livable (like cleaning). I know I cannot continue going on like this for much longer, it is just too much for me.
Well, last week Thursday I decided to apply for a supervisor position at one of the places I work. The deadline was Sunday to turn in one’s application. I really never considered moving into a supervisory position there before. Honestly, even when I found out the last supervisor was being promoted; I never really entertained the thought of moving into this position. But I decided that I would give it a try because I am hoping to reduce the amount of hours I work at 1 job or maybe even quit a job so I can have more free time as well as have additional time to focus on growing my web design business. My thought was simply this, if I was able to get this job, I could manage reducing my full time job down to 3 days a week, do the supervisor job (it’s a part time thing), and have more free time to work on my business and maybe even have some time to relax.
It is now Wednesday and they have not even announced when they plan on interviewing people. So my thoughts now are even if they decide to interview me sometime within the next 2 days, I am not going to take the position. This may sound like not a good reason, but the last 2 nights I worked with the store manager and 1 night with the assistance store manager. Not one of them even said anything about an interview or even mentioned or thanked me for even applying for the job. Again, you may thing this is a poor reason have decided that I didn’t want the job, but the store manager went and spent 20 minutes talking to another co-worker about the job (she has no interest in the job). I personally think she would have been great for the job and part of the reason they want her to have the job is the recommendation from the previous supervisor (He didn’t recommend me because he didn’t think I would be interested in the job seeing I take a lot of days off and he knows about the business run).
Anyways, I know that may have sound like I was wining, but I think I just needed to get it off my chest and put it out there so it wasn’t eating me up inside. Plus writing it has also helped me better understand why not hearing anything from the management staff was bothering me. But I do think that position isn’t the right place for me to be at this time.
It is getting late and I do have to work in the morning (big surprise I know) so I am going to finish this post. I don’t know if I will find time to write on a more regular base soon or not. I would like too and well see I can make it happen. I am also in the works of moving the blog to a new server, so if you visit often, you may see the site down for a very short period of time as things are moved.
As always, thanks for taking the time to read what I ramble about. May God bless you!
Note: I was unable to post this on Wednesday, but was able to do so on Thursday.