This is one of those songs I just can’t stop listening too. As of right now I have listen to it over 550 times on my iPod and my computer using iTunes. The song is a little over 4 ½ minutes long, so that would be roughly 41 hours of my life listening to this song. That is a long time to be spending listening to just one song. What is it about this song that has touched me in a way that I want to listen to it over and over again?
I think the answer can be found in the fact that I am not the best at expressing myself. I have discovered that the music I listen to reflects my current mood and emotions. I’m sure there are a lot of people out there that also listen to different genre of music or songs depending on what is going on in their lives. I feel that this song, Angels on the Moon, by Thriving Ivory, reflects my life as it is right now.
"And Do you know, that every day is the first of the rest of your life?" This line in the song is so true. I try to remember it every day when I wake up. Today is the first day of the rest of my life! What happened yesterday is in the past and I can’t do anything about it. I can only live my life starting today. I can’t change the past. I can only shape the future. I want to shape my future in a positive way. I want to at least make one person’s day a little better. Maybe it’s will be by saying good morning to someone or by smiling at an individual. It could be something more noticeable, helping an elderly lady at the grocery store reach something on a higher shelf. It could be something less noticeable, like doing something for someone without them knowing about it. I do feel that making one person day a little better is an extremely important thing to do. I don’t really know where in the Bible it says this or the exact words, but I do know it’s somewhere in the Old Testament. It talks about how our actions are recorded in a book and our actions are recorded until the end of time, whether they are right or wrong. The act of smiling at another human being is such an easy thing to do and takes very little effort on our part. But that smile can have a huge impact on the person receiving it. It can change their day and maybe someone else’s day that this person encounters. That smile can going on for days, months, and even years from one person to the next. So if you do nothing else today, please smile at one person and start that chain of smiles.
Another part of the song goes "I want to feel, I want to feel all the chemicals inside, I want to feel. I want a sunburn, just to know that I’m alive, to know I’m alive." This rings so true for me. I am one of those people that repress a lot of my emotions. There is part of me that is tired of doing this. That part of me really does want to feel. It wants to experience true love, intimacy, joy, fear, being vulnerable and so much more. That part wants to have the walls that have been built up by so many years of living the life I have, crumble. How, when, and if this will happen are yet to be seen, but I am praying that someday it will.
"This is to one last day in the shadows, and to know a brothers love." I no longer want to live in the shadows. I no longer want to be concerned about dying and ending up where I really don’t want to be. I want to live life. I want to help show the world that one can be both gay and Catholic. I want to use all of what God gave me to help make this world a better place. I don’t want to know if I’m dying, I just want to know that I am living a life that would make God proud of me.
As always, feel free to express your thoughts by posting a comment below. If you want to let others know what songs you listen too depending on the mood you are in, you are more than welcome too.